Tuesday, June 15, 2010

Guilty as Charged

So I am reading a book called, Chasing God and the Kids Too by Cheryl R. Carter hoping to find some methods to re-think my prayer life. Honestly, it really needs some help. It's not that I don't pray, I do. It's more about making it a PRIORITY. I spend time with God but not IN God. I seldom allot any time to hear what He actually says. Instead I pray and move forward. Almost as if I feel I shouldn't waste His time with my "drivel". Yet, He WANTS to hear it. Whether my prayers are of repentance, joy or sorrow. Of happiness or bitterness or loss. I forget how much He really does want to know and care for me. That He will provide the answers if I simply be quiet and listen. There's the rub...I'm seldom still for a moment. It will be interesting to see how being still in Christ will allow Him to work in me.

Already I have heard Him while reading this book and must say, I was convicted. A couple of weeks ago I was so disturbed and, truthfully, appalled at a situation of a friend of mine. I publicly admonished and condemned her in all my self-righteousness. I took a stance of "I survived it. Why can't you?" During my sanctimonious stance did I ONCE pray for her and her family?! Nope! Instead of saying nothing and taking my concerns and disappointment to God's heart for her, her family and my own scars; I judged her and sentenced her. As a friend, that is difficult to admit. As a Christian is is a very hard pill to swallow. I get so wrapped up in what really is NOT my concern. When it should be turned over to God so He may work. I am so ashamed of that behavior and yet so glad the Lord brought it to my attention. Will it ever happen again? I hope not, but if it does...I know who'll be calling me to task. ;) I wouldn't have it any other way.

1 comment:

Quirky Homemaker said...

I'm gonna have to find that book to add to my collection. :-) I was thinking about it yesterday. So, funny I'm reading this today. I pray easily to say "Thank You", but hardly ever pray when I need help. He wants us to pray for every reason. I just need to do it more often. I know what you mean by wanting to be IN God. I kind of want to feel like I'm enveloped always. But, I get busy and forget everything! At church last summer they had a sermon series called 60/60 revolution. You were supposed to set a watch for every hour on the hour and spend 60 seconds in prayer. I never did it. But, it sounds like a good idea to try soon.