A Glance

Now I remember why I don't keep journals...I never seem to keep up with them. Ah well... Lots been goin on with the clan so I seem to be busy with nary a moment to myself.

Last week, CW and I decided to send Goober #1 off to pre-K. Crap! When did he get older?! So I scouted local private schools and we decided on a nearby Christian school. Today I enrolled him and he was able to see the classroom. Took a while to explain to him why he couldn't start today (summer) but he's SO excited to be going. People have said I'll be sad. To be honest, I'm sad that I'm NOT sad. Not that I'm ecstatic, but I am THRILLED to see his joy. KWIM? His enthusiasm for learning is contagious and I know he will LOVE it, hence MY loving it. I figure I should enjoy it while it lasts because when he gets older...who knows how he'll feel about school. Ha! Does this mean I can "school" shop? Yeah...like I need an excuse or somethin to do THAT!!

Meanwhile the other two Goobers are well...different than #1. Miss Princess is...a handful. She has a mind of her own lately that is running smack in to mine nearly everyday. I'm just not sure what to do. I want to cultivate her independence on one hand but feel like I'm losing my mind (and temper) on the other. Tantrums are an everyday occurrence although never OUTSIDE the house. Weird. She mimics Goober #1 which is sometimes a good thing, and other times...not so much. Muddle, muddle through.

Baby Goob is WAY different. He is happy and content most times (except when wet, hungry or tired). He rolls like a roly-poly bug...all over. It's funny though to watch him sit only because he gets SO excited...he knocks himself over. Pretty funny.

On the marriage front...things are not so great. CW & I are still struggling to right the wrongs and just seems we are only managing to make more wrongs. I wonder if love is enough. I mean, I know he loves me. I know I love him. Yet we continue to hurt and mistrust each other at every turn. And in my mind you just don't do that to those you care about. I hate to walk away but I also don't want us to keep this crap up and continue rehashing old and making new wounds. I'd rather SOMETHING be left than nothing at all. I don't know. I'm so confused, and hurt, and angry and sad... Guess we will continue to work at it and see what happens.

That's all for now...gonna try and keep up on this journal a bit more. Cross fingers.